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At the end of the day,  loneliness is just a mindset, how you would know that it can be difficult to get rid of the feelings of loneliness, thus the desire for companionship Is deeply engraned In human nature,

However, this doesn’t mean that we have to suffer when we are alone. That we cannot enjoy ourselves in solitude. A more positive outlook is by spending time by ourselves whether we choose to OR not,  if so. Here’s the concept of aloneness.

Human beings are social creatures that thrive on social interaction but the amount of human interaction that is needed to nor feel lonely is kind of subjective.

Some people spend the majority of their time alone but don’t feel lonely at all.  Others feel terribly lonely in spite of the fact that they are surrounded by people all the time,  it is no doubt that some people are not fun to be with at all.

This presence only makes one feel alone and disconnected, but in many cases,  it’s not the certain situation that causes loneliness, it’s the position we take towards that solution when we think of it,  what’s actually so terrible of being alone. Why should we for example, feel restless, when we spend our Saturday nights in solitude for a significant part,  I think it’s nature in s tribal age, we simply need the group to survive without a tribe,  we were subjected to the harshness of nature with it’s wild animals and sometimes leavable weatherconditions, even though biologically we’re still those tribal animals but the rules of life has changed drastically most modern societies do not require us to mingle at all to survive, this grants us the freedom to bar our own individual ways if we want to.

For many people, this lack of neccesity for human interaction has a bit led to isolation to the next level. Like a Japanese man who had withdrawn from the society almost entirely, I would agree that a certain degree of social interaction is joyful, healthy and also boring, however do value that we at least have the possibility to live on our own and don’t depend too much on others despite the solidarity we missed out on.

A Chinese monk saw that the ability to forget each other, is much better to be clammed together out of neccesity. I quote “when the spring are dried up the fishes collect together on land, than they should moisten one another. There by the damp about  them and keep one another wet by their slime, it would be better for them to forget one another in the rivers and lakes as soon as we see that the ability to be alone is an advantage and privilege that most people in the past did not have, it may be tier to appreciate it even as today. A lot of people are simply convicted to each other and hate no privacy whatsoever so they basically cannot enjoy solitude even if they wanted to.

For spiritual father ostow spoke about the difference between loneliness and aloneness, saying that aloneness, is a state of completeness abs not needing anyone, the term aloneness, doesn’t curtail a voting judgement it’s only points to the circumstances of being alone.

Accompanied by neutrality, it’s neither bad or good it just is. Whereas the term loneliness comes from negative ton, when someone is lonely this person feels alone and suffer because of it. But because aloneness is neutral, the suffering is not a self-evident part of being alone.

If we change our perception of being alone, we can actually enjoy it very much.

Oshaw said that trying to fight loneliness by engaging in relationships is not the long term solutions , because relationship are temporary, deep inside we know this.

Trying to fight our emptiness by friends or a romantic partner will always go together with the fear of losing them.  So the best thing we can do is to cultivate contentment inside and make it independent of the people around us.

We can do this by embracing aloneness, when we are complete within ourselves, we will not cling to other people, hang out with toxic friends, just because we cannot be alone and stay in a relationship with a terrible partner.  Because we cannot live without companionship. Also if we’re content and happy with ourselves we don’t come off as needy,  we paradoxically attract more people that we can share our completeness with.

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